this years kablpomo has been really relaxing. the last years i’ve done it, there have always been days where i say, ack! i forgot to blog! or ack! what am i blogging about? (i’m channeling my inner cathy- comic.)
this year it’s come to me pretty easily, which is nice! and there are a mere 10 entries left, so i’d better get on with my pintertests!
(this bodes well for kablpoye.)
my mom wonders why i have such a fascination with krampus. same thing with the spooky side of halloween.
first – krampus. i first learned of krampus from a classmate in my judeo-christian class at st. ben’s. on st. nicholas day, her parents would rattle the furnace, throw rocks at the windows, and generally do a bunch of spooky stuff. she had a little brother who was prime age for this, so she was looking forward to helping out this year. (she also had a tattoo of a teddy bear on the top of her thigh, which i found intriguing, but has nothing to do with the story.)
how can you appreciate the good if you don’t see the dark? it can’t be puppies and unicorn farts 24/7 – life’s not like that. if it were just santa claus, what’s the worst that happens to bad boys and girls? they get coal? no presents? big whoop – just like every other day of the year (and for people pre-electricity, coal was probably a good present!). by utilizing the dark, there is a worse outcome than just no presents – krampus will come and kidnap you away!
think of all the disney-fied fairy tales. now think of their origins. the originals were a lot more dark than what disney has perpetuated. those medieval peeps knew what they were doing. cinderella’s stepsisters, in the originals, got their eyes pecked out by birds afterward for being so evil. compare that to the disney version, where they just ended up not marrying the prince. sometimes being evil and mean has consequences! a dark element in a story gives the good in a story that much more meaning.
you have to wonder if we coddle ourselves too much these days.
claim: use gelatin and milk to replace spendy biore nose strips!
source: http://petitelefant.com/how-to-pore-strips/
test: well, this definitely works. fortunately i had some gelatine in my cupboard for some reason, so i was able whip this up easily. 1 packet of gelatine mixed with 2 tblsp of milk. mix that bad boy up.
it gets chunky. then put it in the microwave for 10-15 seconds.
it gets soupy, and now’s the time to apply!
the worst part about this stuff?? it STINKS like bad milk. yucko. the instructions say to apply with a popsicle stick, but why waste something like that? use your fingers. 
i just put it on my nose and chin. you can put it all over your face if you’d like. let it dry til you can’t move your mouth. i let it sit for about 20 mins. 
omg time to peel! that was all the farther my mouth would open. that stuff is STIFF. peel back an edge with your fingernail (might take a few tries), and peel away.
and boy does this peel away stuff. it is BETTER than a biore strip. if you have sensitive skin, you might want to not try this, or wait til a weekend so if your skin peels off with the gelatin, you have a day to recover.
smooth as a baby’s butt! my skin is still tingling.
…AND of course, since it was made of milk, sophie had to eat the remains XP
verdict: this works. it takes maybe a minute to prepare. and definitely cheaper than biore. i had a LOT of leftover goo after i applied. i don’t know if it’s possible, but a person could try to put it in the fridge and re-microwave when you want to use it next.
*inspired by jane’s watching of “the muppet movie”. oh, SPOILERS!!!!
10. 500 days of summer – so what if this is the ultimate hipster movie. i love the end. when you think all is lost, one simple name and a breaking of the 4th wall gives a glimmer of hope.
9. the dark knight rises – we see alfred sitting at a cafe. he looks up and smiles. we KNOW it’s bruce, then it cuts to bruce. (really, nolan, you could have cut the scene where we actually see bruce, and it would have been 10% better, but i digress). and to learn that blake’s first name is ROBIN. ha.
8. wild things – nicely done, third wheel!!! ps – the credits are a must watch.
7. breakfast at tiffany’s – rain. a missing cat. a kiss. can’t beat that.
6. shawshank redemption – i give credit to stephen king on writing an awesome book first and foremost (well, novella). the film adaptation was my first exposure, so i have to include it. music adds a ton to the end when we see how andy circumvented the system and got to that end of the sewer pipe. then sweet, sweet justice when he clears out the bank account. add in red’s parole, and reunification with andy, and awwww yeaaahhh.
5. the usual suspects – brilliant, and you don’t see it coming (well, i didn’t). kevin spacey is a genius
4. beauty and the beast – go belle go! barge through the doors on horseback! fly up the stairs! the moment when you think the beast is dead, then she whispers “i love you” JUST before the last petal takes its deadly descent. aw yeah, getting goosebumps just thinking about it.
3. it’s a wonderful life – when george bailey’s brother calls him the richest man in town, liek if you cry evry tiem.
2. muppet movie – this movie is awesome because it has my favorite beginning as well as a favorite ending. everything crashes down, the roof opens up, life seems hopeless for the muppets, and suddenly, a rainbow filters through the hole in the roof. “life’s like a movie, make your own ending, keep believing, keep pretending, we’ve just done what we set out to do…thanks to the lovers, the dreamers, and you!”
1. fivel goes west – for an animated non-disney kids’ sequel filmed on a low budget in 1991, this movie is AWESOME. if you haven’t seen it, i highly suggest finding it asap. jimmy stewart, dom delouise, john cleese, plus some music by james horner. it’s a funny film, but the ending is perfect. jimmy stewart gives some advice to our young fivel as the sun sets in the out west desert. perfect.
once again, santa was a victim of inter-stellar mugging. this was the third time, and it was getting old. speaking of old, he was definitely getting too old for this.
just last night, christmas eve, he was out on his yearly journey, his eight tiny reindeer leaping through the skies toward their destinations. he was almost done – just a few of the aleutians left to drop down chimneys and leave goodies, then it was a quick right toward home. he could smell the hot chocolate laced with bailey’s already. he was dreaming of his comfy bed. his reindeer were dreaming of carrots and oats.
then, out of nowhere, they came for him. it was like they had a wormhole homed in specifically on him every christmas eve. suddenly santa and his sleigh were bathed in a bright blue-white light; the reindeer reared, the sleigh shuddered, and they were beamed aboard.
“not again,” santa muttered. he decided to just close his eyes and let them do their thing.
once in the hull of the ship (it was a huge ship – santa more than once wondered how on earth, with all the fancy detection systems the countries around the world had, that no one had detected it. he had checked the news each of the previous two times he’d been zapped, and nothing), the speedy little suckers swarmed around his sleigh. they were children, climbing all over his sleigh and nosing into his bag. whether or not they were actually children or just transformed to look like kids so he wouldn’t be freaked out, santa didn’t know. all he knew was that he couldn’t kick a kaboodle of kids outta his sleigh.
so he sighed and let them take over. they took his candy canes, his chocolate, the remaining presents, his stash of hot chocolate (sans bailey’s for the sleigh ride), the tinsel in the glove compartment, cookies and candies, the extra stockings, jingle bells – even his naughty list! (he was getting to the age where he forgot often and so needed a list).
then they pulled him from the sleigh, and he obliged. the first time he had protested, but learned that was a mistake when they knocked him out cold and he didn’t wake up for another week. his tummy was certainly grumbling for a sugar cookie by that point.
santa stumbled to the circle in the center of the hull under a bright light. his reindeer snuffled, whites of their eyes showing, and stomped their feet.
“it’s ok lads. i’ll see you soon.” each time his sleigh and reindeer had landed safely at home in the north pole, none worse for the wear except for being stripped of anything of value and a frantic ms. claus.
a murmur in a weird language unknown to santa (and he knew all the languages) went up among the group of alien children who had led him over to the circle, then he felt a familiar swooping sensation, and glimpsing one last look at the horde overtaking his sleigh, he was gone.
*****
his suit was getting a little warm, and why on earth was his comfy bed so unbearable this morning? his mittened hands went up to rub his sandy morning eyes, and they opened on a cityscape. and then it hit him.
mugged again.
let me tell you a story about avoiding childhood trauma by omission. i’m not saying my parents were deceptive; my mom is the most honest person i know. but adult matters don’t need to be discussed with children, especially if their foreseen consequences don’t necessarily come to fruition.
my childhood was not your normal childhood. we lived on welfare and foodstamps for a good two years when i was 11-13 years old while my mom went back to school to get her degree (and get a better job – guess what? welfare works!).
you ask my brother, and he will be able to tell you nothing of that time. my sister liz was amazed at ice cube trays a few years ago, mentioning that we only had store-bought ice growing up. i looked at her like she was crazy; we used ice cube trays until i was 14 years old. needless to say, as the oldest, i remember the most about this time.
i didn’t comprehend the stigma. in fact, a lot of the response we got was positive and in the form of help from church and community members. but as a non-financial-dealing person of the family, i had no idea how stressful this actually was.
i recently found out the reason why we were almost homeless at one point, and for personal reasons (hi mom!) i’m not going to explain. but i will say this: the deception by omission was probably one of the best things my parents did for my siblings’ and my relationships with other family members.
i remember a little about the sale of 60 acres of the family farm (it was my dad’s dad’s land): watching the surveyors and pulling the long 150′ measuring tape along the east edge of the property. only later did i find out some more details – how my mom’s friend helped us out with some money and how close we were to being homeless.
i never wondered the reasons behind the foreclosure on the land – i always thought it was just because we were on welfare. sure, that had to be part of it; if we’d had a lot of money, it wouldn’t have been an issue at all. but after hearing more information, it became a little clearer and understandable, and my relationships were different, so i could more easily come to terms with what i was hearing. if i’d heard it when i was 13, i would have been devastated.
but i will say that the omission my parents performed during that time was for the best. i don’t consider it deceptive, because it was an adult matter. we grow cynical and suspicious with age, and to have that thrust upon a person at an early age is to deprive her of an innocence that doesn’t last forever. we need the hope and wonder of our childhood to keep our cynical selves in check later in life.
diverting back to houseblog, this will be my final houseblog post for a while. why? today nate and i finally closed on our house – two weeks past the initial closing date. woo! finally we are homeowners again. I’m excited to not worry about keeping quiet, paint the walls, put in a garden, PARK IN A GARAGE. omg. winter’s coming, you know. it was nice today, but it’s right around the corner.
and speaking of around the corner, christmas is. but thanksgiving is still only 2 weeks away, and for some reason the coffee shops have decided to get rid of anything pumpkin. i don’t understand it? thanksgiving is as much about pumpkin as halloween is. hello?? pumpkin pie??? but no, they’ve converted to mint everything, and i already miss my pumpkin mocha. (they do still have pumpkin bread, though, which is a relief.)
caribou, if you read this, let’s keep pumpkin around til at least thanksgiving. i like mint as much as the next person, but come on! let’s not rush things! life is short enough as it is to not savor pumpkin as long as possible.
i’ve taken pity on you and decided to write another (non-houseblog) post.
awesome life moments, in no order, except as they come to me in my head. most of these aren’t awesome in the true sense of the word. they are just memories that i remember occasionally and smile when i think about them.
1. best day ever – big gay race/crypticon 2013 with jane. between rainbows in the morning and zombies in the evening with too much to drink, this really was an awesome day.
2. walking through the autumn woods at st. john’s for all those years.
3. when nate and i drove to utah for branden’s wedding. it was a good trip, fun wedding, awesome time. nate and i went to visit the state park island in the great salt lake just as the sun was setting – mountains surrounding us and dirt under our feet. on the way home we stopped in the black hills.
4. speaking of the hills, doing the deadwood tour with my sibs. ate a cheap (but good!) steak at an outdoor bar along with some rocky mountain oysters, then gambled our way up and down the cobblestoned main street.
5. almost seeing santa claus. i was 2-1/2. i was so close. whenever i remember it now, i get hope butterflies in my chest.
6. going to a podunk bar with kerin and angie on a random saturday night. kerin wanted to go see the band, so angie and i went with her to raymond, mn – population 30, i think. cars lined the streets on both sides, all visitors for the two bars the dinky town housed. kerin went to find some people she knew, and angie and i sat at the bar, had a few drinks, and enjoyed the music.
7. the first time nate and i went to the MN state fair. i was amazed at what i’d been missing all those years – what was i thinking, not going??
8. the day in high school when the pep band (yes, i was in the pep band) traveled to the girls’ basketball tournament in the cities and then to the boys’ basketball regions in st. cloud. long day, but absolutely fun!
9. the day i quit merrill. i never felt more free. i miss a lot of the people, but the place and work were pulling me under.
10. finishing nanowrimo in 2007 and 2011. the sense of accomplishment when you tip over 50,000 words is like none other!
things are slowly but surely coming together. except my left pointer finger. i grabbed a scissors today by the blade and cut open my finger. AGAIN. that poor finger. it never gets a break.
put together another bookshelf today for my dvds, and nate bought three folding tobales and lined the entire office with desks. omg.
and tomorrow’s the actual closing on the house!
but really, i had a decent post planned for you tonight, but then the finger thing happened. stupid finger. >:(
in other news, did you know there is actually an organized blog posting month? who knew?? http://www.wisegeek.org/what-is-nablopomo.htm#slideshow
it’s true; buying a house is a money sink. you’d think since i’d already owned a house, i would be set. but each place is different. a brand new house lacks a lot of things. this one needed a washer and dryer, plus all the window treatments – curtain rods, blinds, etc. so not only is it a money sink, it’s a time and work sink. bleah.
and i’m sure you’re all sick and tired of reading about houseblog! let me tell you, i wish houseblog were over as well, because then i could move above and beyond houseblog. and it would mean the house would be set to go! (and clean.)
today i finally got the email i’ve been waiting for since halloween – the rural development loan was finally approved! that only took 3 weeks longer than it should have. closing is scheduled for this friday, and now my anxiety over having to pack up and find somewhere else to live can be kicked to the curb.
onward and upward!