straight, white, female
ran across this list of 100 things straight white females “love”. i thought i’d do a line-by-line analysis.
- Greek Yogurt
depends on the greek yogurt. are you talking about that crap chobani? then absolutely not. greek gods’ nectar OF the gods? then absolutely yes. unfortunately, most people are talking about crappy chobani. - Talking about their feelings
NO - Oatmeal
YES - Christmas
who doesn’t like christmas?? - Wooden boxes
huh? - Anthropologie
the only reason i know what this is is because one of my straight white female friends talk about it. i doubt they make things that fit me. we’ll go wtih no. - Beards
ok, i’ll give you beards 🙂 - Instagram
i use it for work, but don’t see the appeal. - Farmers’ Markets
YES bring me to a farmers’ market!! - Talking about helping the poor
uh, why not help the poor? - Teaching
NO NO NO NONONONONONOOOOO - Renewable Energy
well, this only makes sense. yes. - Froyo
just give me ice cream. - Pretending to be interested in sports
no. i don’t feign interest. - Getting UTIs
who LIKES this??? yuck. - Boots
the boots i like are probably not the kind of boots the article is really talking about. so we’ll say no just on that assumption. - Early-morning, weekend yoga classes
early-morning anything gets the ol’ heave-ho from me. - Their space
yes please - Chardonnay
it’s okaay. not my first choice. meh. - Nutella
yes i’ll take nutella. - Breast cancer awareness
if it’s soley susan g komen, then no. - Going to the bathroom as a group
noooo gross - Bravo
the channel? i don’t get it. - Cake
yes!! - Weird, fuzzy socks
i don’t know about weird, but i like fuzzy socks. - Reading celebrity magazines during Sunday football games
i don’t read celebrity mags and i don’t have sunday football games on any tv near me. - Other people’s baby photos
NO (unless they’re hannah) - Cheese boards
just the board? or does the cheese come with it? if it comes with cheese, shove that down my gullet. - Texting
no necessarily. - Ellipticals
i was hoping this was going to be ellipsis. alas… - Christmas movies
yes! - Homemade jam
not a huge fan of jam - Risotto
depends on the risotto! if it’s yummy, then yes! - Crepes
yes!! - Brunch
breakfast at 11 a.m.? i’ll take it. - Ryan Gosling
no - Titanic
yes! - Stating the obvious
eh - Toms
NO NO NO - Cider
YES YES YES as long as it’s HARD cider. regular cider, no. - Pumpkin-flavored beer
it’s ok. rather have pumpkin bread. - Kale
no - Rom-coms
they’re ok - Puppies
mmm, slobbery, jumpy, stinky puppies? no. maybe from 10 feet away. - Wine bars
no - Pictures
sure? - Moscow Mules
i have no idea what this is - Complaining about cold weather
that’s me! - Mittens
i wear mittens at 50º, so yes. - Hooking up with multiple dudes in same group of Bros
that’s kinda weird… - Sweet potato fries
mmm, these are good. especially with blue cheese dressing. - Reusable grocery bags
when i remember them! - Dressing on the side
no, slather that dressing all over that salad. - Financial stability
what’s that? hahah - Obeying traffic laws
i speed, but otherwise obey most all other laws. not sure what that makes this. - Human rights
why is this even on here? - Throw pillows
they’re ok. - The worst-case scenario
well, things oculd always be worse, right?? - Not being able to sleep at night
yuck, i HATE that. who would love that? - Credit-card debt
and who loves CC debt? seriously – this article is messed up. - Occasionally smoking pot
what’s pot? (LOL) - Mosaic tile
not a huge fan. - Complaining about headaches
no. wish they’d go away. - Umbrellas
i do carry one. i wouldnt’ say i LOVE it, but who wants to get soaked during a rainstorm? - Diet Coke
gross! - Sending other girls pictures of dresses they are thinking about buying
maybe? - Cake pops
yummy! yes! - Hefeweisens
don’t know what this is. - Refilling the ice tray
ugh, i hated refilling the ice tray when i had one. such an easy thing to make a huge deal out of. - Stemless wine glasses
meh - Cleaning up during parties
clean up BEFORE the party. - Prosecco
too sweet for me! - Not taking public transportation
if i had the option of public transport, i’d probably take it. - Being sick
once again, who likes being sick? - Claiming they aren’t into sexting
this is dumb. seriously. who wrote this drivel. - The idea of having a fireplace
ok, so this is not so dumb. - Funfetti
no - Organizing shit
when the muse strikes, i’ll clean/organize, but mostly messes are ok. - Spring
YESSSSSS sprummer! - Venting
sometimes. but most times no. - Their birthday
ABSOLUTELY!! - Group photos
they’re ok. - Pic stitch apps
i’m assuming this is a panorama app or something. can’t you just use the panorama option on your phone? this seems redundant. - Posting pictures to Facebook of the DC monuments that are on their jogging routes
what? i don’t jog in DC. i took a pic of the fencepost in front of a field of purple flowers once on my run, but it sure wasn’t a monument. - Starting a new chapter in their life
change is good! but sometimes the same odl same old is just fine. - Charity events
they’re ok. they generally want money i don’t have though. - Beyonce
meh - Trying new recipes
sure! - Tapas
i’ve never had tapas. anthony bourdain thinks they’re ok, so i guess i could say yes. - Planning to do stuff outside
outside is AWESOME! - Changing out of their heels and into flip-flops at weddings
if you had to stand around in 4″ heels at a wedding, you’d love this too, dudes. - Wineries
eh - Kate Spade sales
too expensive - Throwback Thursday
TT is ok… - Koozies
….can koozies? then yes? - Seeing deer
deer are overrated and everywhere. and when you see them bounding across the road right in front of your car, you get a whole different view of them. - Food blogs
i curate one? so therefore yes? - Half marathons
not yet! - Maxi dresses
no - Peonies
yes. 🙂