Life in the Cheese Drawer

let’s check out how my 2021 “resolutions” went this year. i’m not convinced i did much because 2021 was just meh and a continuation of 2020. burnt out, annoyed with covid, and more annoyed with people who think the economy is more important than people. but let’s check it out.

1. my first item has been photo related for all the time i’ve been making this list, and i think it should remain photo related. let’s take more pics. but what of…
    i don’t think i took more pics. big loser on this one. i’m not feeling inspired for photos lately 🙁
2. i’m going to figure out what i’m going to do this year to help the anti-racist movement. i don’t know what that is, yet. maybe my camera will be involved. sharing non-propagandaed news is one step. confronting racism with those you know is another step. but what else? i’m not sure yet.
   i didn’t go to any events, but what i did do was read more books, both fiction and non-fiction, about and by non-white peeps.
3. this will, of course, make me angry. so therefore, i definitely will continue yoga every day. i did yoga every day in 2019, and in 2020, i did yoga most days (maybe every 10th day i took a day off). although she’s gone physically, fightmaster yoga lives on through her youtube channel, and i will tell everyone i know to keep doing her yoga. it will help you out physically, mentally, and maybe spiritually if that’s the route you want to take yoga. the light in me recognizes and honors the light in you! let your little light shine.
   i did yoga! check.
4. i will keep travel on my list, because i’m already planning a trip to new england in may, and i would like to get out to the black hills in the fall if the virus has calmed down. i would also guess that if there are protests or sit-ins or other items that need documenting, that would involve traveling. my mom also wants to see the milky way this summer, and that means another trip to the north shore! i’m not going to be mad about that. especially the rustic inn where i can get a slice of pie.
   STOOPID COVID. well, we went to new england and that was a blast! and then in august, liz and fam, my mom, and i went to the black hills. so yes, i traveled! no north shore, no milky way. but yes to travel, even though pandemic.
5. RUN A RACE. i don’t care what the length is! i don’t care if we start in waves. i don’t care if it’s ragnar trail and it’s -30º and glare ice the entire trail. i don’t care if i have to roll out of bed at 4 a.m. so i can be ready to run at 5 a.m. – I AM RUNNING A RACE WITH OTHER PEOPLE THIS YEAR.
   I RAN A RACE!!!! we did ragnar trail in september! and no injuries!!
6. convince nate to get a new job. i swear, 99% of his problems would be solved if he would get a job that’s got normal hours. and if 99% of his problems are solved, then i’d venture to say 49.5% of mine are. the other 1% of his problems would be solved if he weren’t allergic to cats. that said, i don’t know if this resolution is doable. i’ll put it down. but don’t be surprised if this has no results.
   yep, no results.
7. welp, some excellent news we learned this year is that recycling plastic was just a big marketing campaign and doesn’t really help. so that’s just great. we still need to help out the earth. we’ve seen what happens when we pause our polluting ways. and like i’ve said before, is it wrong to want a clean earth, even if it DOESN’T stop climate change? how do we stop this plastic inundation? maybe i will start writing campaigns. use my twitter account and all 87 followers to campaign for less plastic in consumables. i have no plan for this, but the farther down the path of climate change we get, the harder it’s going to be to turn around. i’m no global leader, and i’m not a CEO of a giant corporation. i just want this on my list because it’s going to be a top-of-mind item for me this year, and i’ll figure out what to do. (i never said this was a definitive list of 100% goals… they’re more like guidelines.)
   so, climate change is still a thing. let’s keep on keepin on with that one. oh, watch “don’t look up” on netflix.
8. can we be happy, collectively, as a people? i think once the maniac is out of the white house, that will help us breathe a sigh of relief. once the vaccine is more widely accessible, that will help. collectively, i think we’ll be happy again. but i have no doubt i will be able to be happy in 2021 amidst my crusades, because while i am definitely a cynic, i’m optimistic. smiling at little things helps: a smooth lake, a well-crafted sentence, the smell of fall, my stupid cats snoozing in one giant fuzzpuddle, tulips pushing through the dirt, the silence of a snowfall, fireworks, laughing with others.
   so when i went to the doc for my annual physical, i talked to my doc about my anxiety. work had been just a beast – i was the only one after my coworker left, and it was taking its toll. she gave me some meds, mentioning that it would work with depression too. because usually anxiety and depression go hand in hand. to which i thought, i don’t really have depression. generally i am happy; i’m just feeling anxious about stuff! but hopefully that’ll get better. though i have to say, not worrying about WWIII starting with a tweet is nice.

well, turns out i did more than i remembered! the travel checkbox certainly hit the ticket.

2021 items of note:

1. i was the only one in my department at work for 8 months. that was not good and part of the reason my anxiety was overwhelming. we failed the first search and the person we extended an offer to on the second needed more time than usual to get moved. my new coworker started right after thanksgiving and so far so good!
2. i found some reasonable yoga teacher training! it had been niggling on my mind for a while, but was always cost prohibitive. but i just stumbled across YTT at st paul college, where i will get free tuition! so i’m registered for two classes this spring and will do the rest fall semester.
3. i’m also in the middle of a leadership program, which started in june and will conclude in march.

 

2022 goals to come!