Life in the Cheese Drawer

last night i was perusing fb while waiting for a drink at the casino buffet when i saw the announcement that branden’s wife was pregnant. it was like i was hit with a ton of bricks.
i don’t know why this is affecting me so weirdly. megan’s had a kid, angie’s had a kid, liz is about to pop, even seeing that ben had a kid did not affect me so hard as finding out that branden is going to be in charge of a little person.
is it because he’s always going to be that one person frozen in my head as a mainstay of my college years? and why i am SO attached to that time of my life? is there nothing recently or currently that can compare to the awesomeness that was my late teens and early 20s? i don’t get it.
and part of me at this point is like, ok, BRANDEN is having a kid. what am i doing with my life? time to stop dicking around and time to start doing something worthwhile? but what’s worthwhile? just thinking about having a kid wears me out. besides, we all know popping out offspring isn’t the end all be all of our worth.
it’s just a really odd sensation. i’m kind of freaked out.