Understanding of meditation
Meditation is very difficult for me, but I continue to work at it and hope my mind eases a bit each time into a more present moment.
Meditation, for me, is a focus and letting go – letting go of the intrusive thoughts that enter my mind while I’m meditating. Just notice the thoughts and then let them go on their way. It’s also a focus on the breath, on the in and out and how it fills and leaves the lungs. Counting my breaths also helps me focus more, though my thoughts do intrude more often than I’d like.
When I meditate, I also like to scan my body and notice the different parts, usually from head to toe. As I notice the different parts of my body, I can sometimes feel that particular part relax a little bit more.
The focus and letting go help to put me more in the present moment and the mind and body that is with me now, the only moment we have. The clearing of the mind helps me relax and prepares me for other interactions through the day. With a clear head and relaxed body, I feel like I can be a better decision maker.
Personally, meditation is just one way to ease my anxiety and stress. The best way for me to banish anxiety is through focused activity. A yoga practice on a daily basis is my best meditation practice right now, as the focus on the poses and positioning of the body clears my mind of all other thoughts. Another activity that is really meditative for me is doing puzzles. Something about looking for the right piece in color, shape, and size is a completely focused activity, and hours can pass without me noticing. Puzzles clear all other problems from my head.
On the flip side, one activity that does NOT help with my anxiety is running, though you would think a repetitive physical activity would be a meditative practice. I have tried to meditate during a run and have failed spectacularly. One of the methods was to count footsteps as you went along, and that did nothing but put my focus on how much work and effort it was taking to run and how much my feet hit the ground. I’ve since decided that the best way to get through a run is to turn up the music, look at my surroundings, and just deal with my thoughts that dwell in my mind while I run. After I’m done, I feel invigorated and refreshed, even if the run wasn’t meditative in nature.
I hope that by taking part in a more regular meditation practice, maybe after my yoga practices or at the beginning of my days, I can learn to do them more often and relieve stress and anxiety throughout the day instead of at the end or beginning. At some point, I hope for it to be second nature to take a moment to meditate and clear the mind and spirit.